he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
