So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
