whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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