(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
