Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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