just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
