STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Randomize
