Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
