OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
