Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize