hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize