You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I am in a vortex of obligation.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
