Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize