My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
