you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
