the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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