good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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