i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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