You smell like stripper and shame
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
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