I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
So gin and wine won't be happening again
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i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
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Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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