Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
