i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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