I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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