Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
