i just sent this text using only my big toe
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We have started to decorate penises.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
