Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
