The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
