Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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