It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
