Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize