it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Randomize
