I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
So many bounce houses so little time
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize