I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
