yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
