pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize