Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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