This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize