i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
