from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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