3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
