I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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