dude i'm inner monologue high
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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