Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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