let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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