Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
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