He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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