Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
