those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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