Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
