This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
